The Official Website, go and click the Think Feel Know book;
To view the contents of the book click The Book's Table of Content; and
To view snippets of the book, please click the Google Books site.
Monday, February 10, 2014
The Science of Understanding People: How To Connect With People In Business and In Life - By Clive Hyland
The Official Website, go and click the Think Feel Know book;
To view the contents of the book click The Book's Table of Content; and
To view snippets of the book, please click the Google Books site.
Moving Forward: Taking The Lead In Your Life - By Dave Pelzer
First Read: 8 February 2014
Contents
Preface: Your Beliefs
Chapter One: Learning to Let Go
Chapter Two: Better for You, Less to Carry
Chapter Three: You Gotta Believe
Chapter Four: Use It or Lose It
Chapter Five: True Leaders?
Chapter Six: Stepping Up
Chapter Seven: The True Mentor
Chapter Eight: Holding the Line
Chapter Nine: Living Your Life
Epilogue
About the Author
--
Preface
...
Chapter Three: You Gotta Believe
Dave shared his experience and journey from a cook to piloting F-117 Stealth Fighter (see picture attached)
and flying ops in the 1990 War in the Gulf, Operation Desert Shield.
He mentioned, it was his "IGNORANT PERSISTENCE" that let him attained his end goal regardless of the hurdles he faced.
I reckoned it was also his "Jump Wings" from his Army Airborne Training (see photo attached)
impresses the mid-ranking sergeant to push his application up.
Well, all in all, it was a good story.
He ended with his pointers and questions:
Contents
Preface: Your Beliefs
Chapter One: Learning to Let Go
Chapter Two: Better for You, Less to Carry
Chapter Three: You Gotta Believe
Chapter Four: Use It or Lose It
Chapter Five: True Leaders?
Chapter Six: Stepping Up
Chapter Seven: The True Mentor
Chapter Eight: Holding the Line
Chapter Nine: Living Your Life
Epilogue
About the Author
--
Preface
...
Chapter Three: You Gotta Believe
Dave shared his experience and journey from a cook to piloting F-117 Stealth Fighter (see picture attached)
He mentioned, it was his "IGNORANT PERSISTENCE" that let him attained his end goal regardless of the hurdles he faced.
I reckoned it was also his "Jump Wings" from his Army Airborne Training (see photo attached)
Well, all in all, it was a good story.
He ended with his pointers and questions:
- Of all the different aspects of your life, what is the singular core belief that you best represent?
- If a situation is not going your way, will you fight for your cause? If so, how hard will yo push yourself and what do you think gives you that determination?
- In the past, when an unfortunate situation occurred, can you recall that singular belief, that one mere idea, that helped pull you through? Can you recall how you felt at that time?
- When an unexpected situation occurs, do you automatically lock up, believing only the worst that may happen, or, after you vent and reassess the situation, do you find a way not only to move forward but totally to overcome the situation? What do you think gives you that strength?
- Regardless of the situation that yo may be engaged in, can you find a calmness from within?
- At the end of the day, no matter the outcome of the situation, do you believe you gave it your best shot? Are you at least proud that you gave it a shot?
- Regardless of how many times you may have not achieved your objectives, do you believe in yourself?
Saturday, November 9, 2013
People Smart in Business
HPart One"Understanding People Smarts" contains four powerful chapters that help you to identify and better deal with virtually everyone. The "The Platinum Rule®" chapter teaches you more about treating others the way they want to be treated, not the way you want to be treated -without being phony or underhanded. The "I Know Who You Are, But What Am I?" chapter describes each behavioral style and help you determine which one you are. Next, you learn how to identify other people's natural styles. The "Adaptability" chapter includes both versatility and flexibility characteristics and helps you determine how adaptable you are in life's varying situations.
Part Two of People Smart in Business deals with "Workplace Applications." The three chapters here focus on getting along with everyone on the job, leadership styles, and how to sell and deliver quality service with style. This is a reader-friendly book. You can use and re-use it as a constant companion to consult when dealing with difficult people and stressful situations. People Smart in Businessgives you the tools to get what you want in various work situations and equips you with the power and knowledge to cash in on these insights through more positive and productive exchanges with others. You can realistically take charge of improving all your work relationships and this book shows how.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman
Emotional Intelligence: Why it Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman
.jpg)
Firnando Chau Review
The contents are:
Introduction
Aristotle's Challenge
Part One: The Emotional Brain
1. What are Emotions For?
2. Anatomy of an Emotional Hijacking
Part Two: The Nature of Emotional Intelligence
3. When Smart is Dumb
4. Know Thyself
5. Passion's Slaves
6. The Master Aptitude
7. The Roots of Empathy
8. The Social Arts
Part Three: Emotional Intelligence Applied
9. Intimate Enemies
10. Managing with Heart
11. Mind and Medicine
Part Four: Windows of Opportunity
12. The Family Crucible
13. Trauma and Emotional Relearning
14. Temperament Is Not Destiny
Part Five: Emotional Literacy
15. The Cost of Emotional Illiteracy
16. Schooling the Emotions
Appendix A: What is Emotion?
Appendix B: Hallmarks of the Emotional Mind
Appendix C: The Neural Circuitry of Fear
Appendix D: W. T. Grant Consortium: Active Ingredients of Prevention Programs
Appendix E: The Self Silence Curriculum
Appendix F: Social and Emotional Learning: Results
Resources
Notes
Acknowledgements
Index
--
About the Book:-
Paperback: 368 pages
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC (September 12, 1996)
ISBN-10: 0747528306
ISBN-13: 978-0747528302
Amazon.com Review
The Western cultures esteem analytical skills measured by IQ tests: but there is clearly more to success and happiness, even in technological societies, than IQ alone. Goleman has written one of the best books on the nature and importance of other kinds of intelligence besides our perhaps overly beloved IQ. Recommended. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
From Publishers Weekly
New York Times science writer Goleman argues that our emotions play a much greater role in thought, decision making and individual success than is commonly acknowledged. He defines "emotional intelligence"?a trait not measured by IQ tests?as a set of skills, including control of one's impulses, self-motivation, empathy and social competence in interpersonal relationships. Although his highly accessible survey of research into cognitive and emotional development may not convince readers that this grab bag of faculties comprise a clearly recognizable, well-defined aptitude, his report is nevertheless an intriguing and practical guide to emotional mastery. In marriage, emotional intelligence means listening well and being able to calm down. In the workplace, it manifests when bosses give subordinates constructive feedback regarding their performance. Goleman also looks at pilot programs in schools from New York City to Oakland, Calif., where kids are taught conflict resolution, impulse control and social skills.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Scientific data emerging from studies using new brain imaging technologies have yielded fresh understanding of how emotions work and, argues the author, suggest ways to regulate the more negative emotions responsible for the horrendous acts of violence that are the stuff of daily headlines. The book calls for universal adoption of educational curricula that teach youngsters how to regulate their emotional responses and to resolve conflict peacefully. Along the way Goleman summarizes much of the best psychological work of the last few decades on such topics as the importance of learned optimism, the theory of multiple intelligences, the role of innate temperamental differences, and the importance of emotional intelligence in marriage, management, and medicine. Based on good empirical data (unlike many popular psychology books), this fine example is recommended for academic and larger public libraries. -- Mary Ann Hughes, Neill P.L., Pullman, Wash.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Booklist
If your class valedictorian did not become the soaring success everyone predicted, perhaps his IQ exceeded his EQ. Psychologist Daniel Goleman's latest book is a fascinating depiction of the role emotional intelligence plays in defining character and determining destiny. He has produced an eminently readable and persuasive work that shows us how to develop our emotional intelligence in ways that can improve our relationships, our parenting, our classrooms, and our workplaces. Goleman assures us that our temperaments may be determined by neurochemistry, but they can be altered. We could turn society on its ear if we learned to recognize our emotions and control our reactions; if we combined our thinking with our feeling; if we learned to follow our flow of feelings in our search for creativity. This well-researched work persuades us to teach our children an important lesson: humanity lies in our feelings, not our facts. This is an engrossing, captivating work that should be read by anyone who wants to improve self, family, or world. Patricia Hassler --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Review
'An impressive argument that excellence is more than IQ' Daily Mail 'A well-written and practical guide to the emotions, perfectly pitched in tone and scope' Financial Times 'Forget IQ. Brains may come in useful, as may social class and luck, but as a predictor of who will succeed in any area of life, EQ is the thing to worry about' Good Housekeeping
About the Book
The groundbreaking bestseller that redefines intelligence and success Does IQ define our destiny? Daniel Goleman argues that our view of human intelligence is far too narrow, and that our emotions play major role in thought, decision making and individual success. Self-awareness, impulse control, persistence, motivation, empathy and social deftness are all qualities that mark people who excel: whose relationships flourish, who are stars in the workplace. With new insights into the brain architecture underlying emotion and rationality, Goleman shows precisely how emotional intelligence can be nurtured and strengthened in all of us.
From the Publisher
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until the discoveries of modern brain researchers, theorists could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's fascinating report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers us startling new insight into our "two minds" -- the rational and the emotional -- and how they together shape our destiny. Beginning deep in the brain, Emotional Intelligence shows us the exact mechanism of an "emotional hijack," when passion overcomes reason. Through vivid examples, Goleman then delineates the crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships and work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is a crucial new way to talk about being smart. The final chapters reveal the possibilities -- and limits -- of "emotional literary," as it is taught by both parents and educators. The book concludes with a compelling vision of what true emotional intelligence means for us both as individuals and as a society. The message of this eye-opening book is one we must take to heart: the true "bell curve" for a democracy must measure emotional intelligence. Daniel Goleman offers a new vision of excellence and a vital new curriculum for life that can change the future for us and our children.
From the Inside Flap
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until the discoveries of modern brain researchers, theorists could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's fascinating report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers us startling new insight into our "two minds" -- the rational and the emotional -- and how they together shape our destiny. Beginning deep in the brain, Emotional Intelligence shows us the exact mechanism of an "emotional hijack," when passion overcomes reason. Through vivid examples, Goleman then delineates the crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships and work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is a crucial new way to talk about being smart. The final chapters reveal the possibilities -- and limits -- of "emotional literary," as it is taught by both parents and educators. The book concludes with a compelling vision of what true emotional intelligence means for us both as individuals and as a society. The message of this eye-opening book is one we must take to heart: the true "bell curve" for a democracy must measure emotional intelligence. Daniel Goleman offers a new vision of excellence and a vital new curriculum for life that can change the future for us and our children.
From the Back Cover
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society." -- Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are.
About the Author
Daniel Goleman, PhD, covers the behavioural and brain sciences for the New York Times and his articles appear throughout the world in syndication. His latest book, Destructive Emotions: A Scientific Dialogue with the Dalai Lama, was published in January 2003. He has taught at Harvard (where he received his PhD) and was formerly senior editor at Psychology Today. His previous books include Vital Lies, Simple Truths; The Meditative Mind; and as co-author, The Creative Spirit. He was also a contributor to the business reference work, Business: The Ultimate Resource.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
The New Yardstick
The rules for work are changing. We're being judged by a new yardstick: not just by how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other. This yardstick is increasingly applied in choosing who will be hired and who will not, who will be let go and who retained, who passed over and who promoted.
The new rules predict who is most likely to become a star performer and who is most prone to derailing. And, no matter what field we work in currently, they measure the traits that are crucial to our marketability for future jobs.
These rules have little to do with what we were told was important in school; academic abilities are largely irrelevant to this standard. The new measure takes for granted having enough intellectual ability and technical know-how to do our jobs; it focuses instead on personal qualities, such as initiative and empathy, adaptability and persuasiveness.
This is no passing fad, nor just the management nostrum of the moment. The data that argue for taking it seriously are based on studies of tens of thousands of working people, in callings of every kind. The research distills with unprecedented precision which qualities mark a star performer. And it demonstrates which human abilities make up the greater part of the ingredients for excellence at work—most especially for leadership.
If you work in a large organization, even now you are probably being evaluated in terms of these capabilities, though you may not know it. If you are applying for a job, you are likely to be scrutinized through this lens, though, again, no one will tell you so explicitly. Whatever your job, understanding how to cultivate these capabilities can be essential for success in your career.
If you are part of a management team, you need to consider whether your organization fosters these competencies or discourages them. To the degree your organizational climate nourishes these competencies, your organization will be more effective and productive. You will maximize your group's intelligence, the synergistic interaction of every person's best talents.
If you work for a small organization or for yourself, your ability to perform at peak depends to a very great extent on your having these abilities—though almost certainly you were never taught them in school. Even so, your career will depend, to a greater or lesser extent, on how well you have mastered these capacities.
In a time with no guarantees of job security, when the very concept of a "job" is rapidly being replaced by "portable skills," these are prime qualities that make and keep us employable. Talked about loosely for decades under a variety of names, from "character" and "personality" to "soft skills" and "competence," there is at last a more precise understanding of these human talents, and a new name for them: emotional intelligence.
A Different Way of Being Smart
"I had the lowest cumulative grade point average ever in my engineering school," the codirector of a consulting firm tells me. "But when I joined the army and went to officer candidate school, I was number one in my class—it was all about how you handle yourself, get along with people, work in teams, leadership. And that's what I find to be true in the world of work."
In other words, what matters is a different way of being smart. In my book Emotional Intelligence, my focus was primarily on education, though a short chapter dealt with implications for work and organizational life.
What caught me by utter surprise—and delighted me—was the flood of interest from the business community. Responding to a tidal wave of letters and faxes, e-mails and phone calls, requests to speak and consult, I found myself on a global odyssey, talking to thousands of people, from CEOs to secretaries, about what it means to bring emotional intelligence to work.
* * *
This search has taken me back to research I participated in while a graduate student, and then faculty member, at Harvard University. That research was part of an early challenge to the IQ mystique—the false but widely embraced notion that what matters for success is intellect alone. This work helped spawn what has now become a mini-industry that analyzes the actual competencies that make people successful in jobs and organizations of every kind, and the findings are astonishing: IQ takes second position to emotional intelligence in determining outstanding job performance.
Analyses done by dozens of different experts in close to five hundred corporations, government agencies, and nonprofit organizations worldwide have arrived independently at remarkably similar conclusions, and their findings are particularly compelling because they avoid the biases or limits inherent in the work of a single individual or group. Their conclusions all point to the paramount place of emotional intelligence in excellence on the job--in virtually any job.
Some Misconceptions
As I've toured the world talking and consulting with people in business, I've encountered certain widespread misunderstandings about emotional intelligence. Let me clear up some of the most common at the outset. First, emotional intelligence does not mean merely "being nice." At strategic moments it may demand not "being nice," but rather, for example, bluntly confronting someone with an uncomfortable but consequential truth they've been avoiding.
Second, emotional intelligence does not mean giving free rein to feelings—"letting it all hang out." Rather, it means managing feelings so that they are expressed appropriately and effectively, enabling people to work together smoothly toward their common goals.
Also, women are not "smarter" than men when it comes to emotional intelligence, nor are men superior to women. Each of us has a personal profile of strengths and weaknesses in these capacities. Some of us may be highly empathic but lack some abilities to handle our own distress; others may be quite aware of the subtlest shift in our own moods, yet be inept socially.
It is true that men and women as groups tend to have a shared, gender-specific profile of strong and weak points. An analysis of emotional intelligence in thousands of men and women found that women, on average, are more aware of their emotions, show more empathy, and are more adept interpersonally. Men, on the other hand, are more self-confident and optimistic, adapt more easily, and handle stress better.
In general, however, there are far more similarities than differences. Some men are as empathic as the most interpersonally sensitive women, while some women are every bit as able to withstand stress as the most emotionally resilient men. Indeed, on average, looking at the overall ratings for men and women, the strengths and weaknesses average out, so that in terms of total emotional intelligence, there are no sex differences.
Finally, our level of emotional intelligence is not fixed genetically, nor does it develop only in early childhood. Unlike IQ, which changes little after our teen years, emotional intelligence seems to be largely learned, and it continues to develop as we go through life and learn from our experiences—our competence in it can keep growing. In fact, studies that have tracked people's level of emotional intelligence through the years show that people get better and better in these capabilities as they grow more adept at handling their own emotions and impulses, at motivating themselves, and at honing their empathy and social adroitness. There is an old-fashioned word for this growth in emotional intelligence: maturity.
Why This Matters Now
At a California biotech start-up, the CEO proudly enumerated the features that made his organization state-of-the-art: No one, including him, had a fixed office; instead, everyone carried a small laptop—their mobile office—and was wired to everyone else. Job titles were irrelevant; employees worked in cross-functional teams and the place bubbled with creative energy. People routinely put in seventy- and eighty-hour work weeks.
"So what's the downside?" I asked him.
"There is no downside," he assured me.
And that was the fallacy. Once I was free to talk with staff members, I heard the truth: The hectic pace had people feeling burned out and robbed of their private lives. And though everyone could talk via computer to everyone else, people felt that no one was truly listening to them.
People desperately felt the need for connection, for empathy, for open communication.
In the new, stripped-down, every-job-counts business climate, these human realities will matter more than ever. Massive change is a constant; technical innovations, global competition, and the pressures of institutional investors are ever-escalating forces for flux.
Another reality makes emotional intelligence ever more crucial: As organizations shrink through waves of downsizing, those people who remain are more accountable—and more visible. Where earlier a midlevel employee might easily hide a hot temper or shyness, now competencies such as managing one's emotions, handling encounters well, teamwork, and leadership, show—and count--more than ever.
The globalization of the workforce puts a particular premium on emotional intelligence in wealthier countries. Higher wages in these countries, if they are to be maintained, will depend on a new kind of productivity. And structural fixes or technological advances alone are not enough: As at the California biotech firm, streamlining or other innovations often create new problems that cry out for even greater emotional intelligence.
1. Ecological Intelligence: The Hidden Impacts of What We Buy (2010)
2. Measuring the Immeasurable: The Scientific Case for Spirituality (2008)
3. Social intelligence (2007)
4. Destructive emotions: how can we overcome them? : a scientific dialogue with the Dalai Lama (2004)
7. Vital lies, simple truths: the psychology of self-deception (1998)
8. The Meditative Mind (1988)
Co-Authors of other books:
1. Building Emotional Intelligence: Techniques to Cultivate Inner Strength in Children (2008) Co-Authored with Linda Lantieri
2. Transparency: How Leaders Create a Culture of Candor (2008) Co-authored with
Warren G. Bennis & James O'Toole
3. The Joy of Living: Unlocking the Secret and Science of Happiness (2008) Co-authored with Yongey Mingyur, & Eric Swanson
4. Primal leadership: learning to lead with emotional intelligence (2004) Co-Authored with Richard E. Boyatzis & Annie McKee
5. The new leaders: transforming the art of leadership into the science of results (2003) Co-authored with Richard E. Boyatzis, Annie McKee
6. The emotionally intelligent workplace: how to select for, measure, and improve emotional intelligence in individuals, groups, and organizations (2001) Co-authored with Cary Cherniss
7. Harvard business review on what makes a leader (2001) Co-Authored with Michael MacCoby, Thomas Davenport, John C. Beck, Clampa Dan
10. MindScience: an East-West dialogue (1991) Co-Authored with Robert A. F. Thurman
11. The essential psychotherapies: theory and practice by the masters (1982) Co-authored with Kathleen Riordan Speeth
12. Introductory psychology (1982) Co-authored with Trygg Engen, Anthony Davids
13. Consciousness, the brain, states of awareness, and alternate realities (1979) Co-Authored with Richard J. Davidson
.jpg)
Firnando Chau Review
The contents are:
Introduction
Aristotle's Challenge
Part One: The Emotional Brain
1. What are Emotions For?
2. Anatomy of an Emotional Hijacking
Part Two: The Nature of Emotional Intelligence
3. When Smart is Dumb
4. Know Thyself
5. Passion's Slaves
6. The Master Aptitude
7. The Roots of Empathy
8. The Social Arts
Part Three: Emotional Intelligence Applied
9. Intimate Enemies
10. Managing with Heart
11. Mind and Medicine
Part Four: Windows of Opportunity
12. The Family Crucible
13. Trauma and Emotional Relearning
14. Temperament Is Not Destiny
Part Five: Emotional Literacy
15. The Cost of Emotional Illiteracy
16. Schooling the Emotions
Appendix A: What is Emotion?
Appendix B: Hallmarks of the Emotional Mind
Appendix C: The Neural Circuitry of Fear
Appendix D: W. T. Grant Consortium: Active Ingredients of Prevention Programs
Appendix E: The Self Silence Curriculum
Appendix F: Social and Emotional Learning: Results
Resources
Notes
Acknowledgements
Index
--
About the Book:-
Paperback: 368 pages
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing PLC (September 12, 1996)
ISBN-10: 0747528306
ISBN-13: 978-0747528302
Amazon.com Review
The Western cultures esteem analytical skills measured by IQ tests: but there is clearly more to success and happiness, even in technological societies, than IQ alone. Goleman has written one of the best books on the nature and importance of other kinds of intelligence besides our perhaps overly beloved IQ. Recommended. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
From Publishers Weekly
New York Times science writer Goleman argues that our emotions play a much greater role in thought, decision making and individual success than is commonly acknowledged. He defines "emotional intelligence"?a trait not measured by IQ tests?as a set of skills, including control of one's impulses, self-motivation, empathy and social competence in interpersonal relationships. Although his highly accessible survey of research into cognitive and emotional development may not convince readers that this grab bag of faculties comprise a clearly recognizable, well-defined aptitude, his report is nevertheless an intriguing and practical guide to emotional mastery. In marriage, emotional intelligence means listening well and being able to calm down. In the workplace, it manifests when bosses give subordinates constructive feedback regarding their performance. Goleman also looks at pilot programs in schools from New York City to Oakland, Calif., where kids are taught conflict resolution, impulse control and social skills.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Library Journal
Scientific data emerging from studies using new brain imaging technologies have yielded fresh understanding of how emotions work and, argues the author, suggest ways to regulate the more negative emotions responsible for the horrendous acts of violence that are the stuff of daily headlines. The book calls for universal adoption of educational curricula that teach youngsters how to regulate their emotional responses and to resolve conflict peacefully. Along the way Goleman summarizes much of the best psychological work of the last few decades on such topics as the importance of learned optimism, the theory of multiple intelligences, the role of innate temperamental differences, and the importance of emotional intelligence in marriage, management, and medicine. Based on good empirical data (unlike many popular psychology books), this fine example is recommended for academic and larger public libraries. -- Mary Ann Hughes, Neill P.L., Pullman, Wash.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
From Booklist
If your class valedictorian did not become the soaring success everyone predicted, perhaps his IQ exceeded his EQ. Psychologist Daniel Goleman's latest book is a fascinating depiction of the role emotional intelligence plays in defining character and determining destiny. He has produced an eminently readable and persuasive work that shows us how to develop our emotional intelligence in ways that can improve our relationships, our parenting, our classrooms, and our workplaces. Goleman assures us that our temperaments may be determined by neurochemistry, but they can be altered. We could turn society on its ear if we learned to recognize our emotions and control our reactions; if we combined our thinking with our feeling; if we learned to follow our flow of feelings in our search for creativity. This well-researched work persuades us to teach our children an important lesson: humanity lies in our feelings, not our facts. This is an engrossing, captivating work that should be read by anyone who wants to improve self, family, or world. Patricia Hassler --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Review
'An impressive argument that excellence is more than IQ' Daily Mail 'A well-written and practical guide to the emotions, perfectly pitched in tone and scope' Financial Times 'Forget IQ. Brains may come in useful, as may social class and luck, but as a predictor of who will succeed in any area of life, EQ is the thing to worry about' Good Housekeeping
About the Book
The groundbreaking bestseller that redefines intelligence and success Does IQ define our destiny? Daniel Goleman argues that our view of human intelligence is far too narrow, and that our emotions play major role in thought, decision making and individual success. Self-awareness, impulse control, persistence, motivation, empathy and social deftness are all qualities that mark people who excel: whose relationships flourish, who are stars in the workplace. With new insights into the brain architecture underlying emotion and rationality, Goleman shows precisely how emotional intelligence can be nurtured and strengthened in all of us.
From the Publisher
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until the discoveries of modern brain researchers, theorists could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's fascinating report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers us startling new insight into our "two minds" -- the rational and the emotional -- and how they together shape our destiny. Beginning deep in the brain, Emotional Intelligence shows us the exact mechanism of an "emotional hijack," when passion overcomes reason. Through vivid examples, Goleman then delineates the crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships and work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is a crucial new way to talk about being smart. The final chapters reveal the possibilities -- and limits -- of "emotional literary," as it is taught by both parents and educators. The book concludes with a compelling vision of what true emotional intelligence means for us both as individuals and as a society. The message of this eye-opening book is one we must take to heart: the true "bell curve" for a democracy must measure emotional intelligence. Daniel Goleman offers a new vision of excellence and a vital new curriculum for life that can change the future for us and our children.
From the Inside Flap
Everyone knows that high IQ is no guarantee of success, happiness, or virtue, but until the discoveries of modern brain researchers, theorists could only guess why. Daniel Goleman's fascinating report from the frontiers of psychology and neuroscience offers us startling new insight into our "two minds" -- the rational and the emotional -- and how they together shape our destiny. Beginning deep in the brain, Emotional Intelligence shows us the exact mechanism of an "emotional hijack," when passion overcomes reason. Through vivid examples, Goleman then delineates the crucial skills of emotional intelligence, and shows how they determine our success in relationships and work, and even our physical well-being. What emerges is a crucial new way to talk about being smart. The final chapters reveal the possibilities -- and limits -- of "emotional literary," as it is taught by both parents and educators. The book concludes with a compelling vision of what true emotional intelligence means for us both as individuals and as a society. The message of this eye-opening book is one we must take to heart: the true "bell curve" for a democracy must measure emotional intelligence. Daniel Goleman offers a new vision of excellence and a vital new curriculum for life that can change the future for us and our children.
From the Back Cover
"Impressive in its scope and depth, staggering in its implications, Emotional Intelligence gives us an entirely new way of looking at the root causes of many of the ills of our families and our society." -- Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D., author of Wherever You Go, There You Are.
About the Author
Daniel Goleman, PhD, covers the behavioural and brain sciences for the New York Times and his articles appear throughout the world in syndication. His latest book, Destructive Emotions: A Scientific Dialogue with the Dalai Lama, was published in January 2003. He has taught at Harvard (where he received his PhD) and was formerly senior editor at Psychology Today. His previous books include Vital Lies, Simple Truths; The Meditative Mind; and as co-author, The Creative Spirit. He was also a contributor to the business reference work, Business: The Ultimate Resource.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
The New Yardstick
The rules for work are changing. We're being judged by a new yardstick: not just by how smart we are, or by our training and expertise, but also by how well we handle ourselves and each other. This yardstick is increasingly applied in choosing who will be hired and who will not, who will be let go and who retained, who passed over and who promoted.
The new rules predict who is most likely to become a star performer and who is most prone to derailing. And, no matter what field we work in currently, they measure the traits that are crucial to our marketability for future jobs.
These rules have little to do with what we were told was important in school; academic abilities are largely irrelevant to this standard. The new measure takes for granted having enough intellectual ability and technical know-how to do our jobs; it focuses instead on personal qualities, such as initiative and empathy, adaptability and persuasiveness.
This is no passing fad, nor just the management nostrum of the moment. The data that argue for taking it seriously are based on studies of tens of thousands of working people, in callings of every kind. The research distills with unprecedented precision which qualities mark a star performer. And it demonstrates which human abilities make up the greater part of the ingredients for excellence at work—most especially for leadership.
If you work in a large organization, even now you are probably being evaluated in terms of these capabilities, though you may not know it. If you are applying for a job, you are likely to be scrutinized through this lens, though, again, no one will tell you so explicitly. Whatever your job, understanding how to cultivate these capabilities can be essential for success in your career.
If you are part of a management team, you need to consider whether your organization fosters these competencies or discourages them. To the degree your organizational climate nourishes these competencies, your organization will be more effective and productive. You will maximize your group's intelligence, the synergistic interaction of every person's best talents.
If you work for a small organization or for yourself, your ability to perform at peak depends to a very great extent on your having these abilities—though almost certainly you were never taught them in school. Even so, your career will depend, to a greater or lesser extent, on how well you have mastered these capacities.
In a time with no guarantees of job security, when the very concept of a "job" is rapidly being replaced by "portable skills," these are prime qualities that make and keep us employable. Talked about loosely for decades under a variety of names, from "character" and "personality" to "soft skills" and "competence," there is at last a more precise understanding of these human talents, and a new name for them: emotional intelligence.
A Different Way of Being Smart
"I had the lowest cumulative grade point average ever in my engineering school," the codirector of a consulting firm tells me. "But when I joined the army and went to officer candidate school, I was number one in my class—it was all about how you handle yourself, get along with people, work in teams, leadership. And that's what I find to be true in the world of work."
In other words, what matters is a different way of being smart. In my book Emotional Intelligence, my focus was primarily on education, though a short chapter dealt with implications for work and organizational life.
What caught me by utter surprise—and delighted me—was the flood of interest from the business community. Responding to a tidal wave of letters and faxes, e-mails and phone calls, requests to speak and consult, I found myself on a global odyssey, talking to thousands of people, from CEOs to secretaries, about what it means to bring emotional intelligence to work.
* * *
This search has taken me back to research I participated in while a graduate student, and then faculty member, at Harvard University. That research was part of an early challenge to the IQ mystique—the false but widely embraced notion that what matters for success is intellect alone. This work helped spawn what has now become a mini-industry that analyzes the actual competencies that make people successful in jobs and organizations of every kind, and the findings are astonishing: IQ takes second position to emotional intelligence in determining outstanding job performance.
Analyses done by dozens of different experts in close to five hundred corporations, government agencies, and nonprofit organizations worldwide have arrived independently at remarkably similar conclusions, and their findings are particularly compelling because they avoid the biases or limits inherent in the work of a single individual or group. Their conclusions all point to the paramount place of emotional intelligence in excellence on the job--in virtually any job.
Some Misconceptions
As I've toured the world talking and consulting with people in business, I've encountered certain widespread misunderstandings about emotional intelligence. Let me clear up some of the most common at the outset. First, emotional intelligence does not mean merely "being nice." At strategic moments it may demand not "being nice," but rather, for example, bluntly confronting someone with an uncomfortable but consequential truth they've been avoiding.
Second, emotional intelligence does not mean giving free rein to feelings—"letting it all hang out." Rather, it means managing feelings so that they are expressed appropriately and effectively, enabling people to work together smoothly toward their common goals.
Also, women are not "smarter" than men when it comes to emotional intelligence, nor are men superior to women. Each of us has a personal profile of strengths and weaknesses in these capacities. Some of us may be highly empathic but lack some abilities to handle our own distress; others may be quite aware of the subtlest shift in our own moods, yet be inept socially.
It is true that men and women as groups tend to have a shared, gender-specific profile of strong and weak points. An analysis of emotional intelligence in thousands of men and women found that women, on average, are more aware of their emotions, show more empathy, and are more adept interpersonally. Men, on the other hand, are more self-confident and optimistic, adapt more easily, and handle stress better.
In general, however, there are far more similarities than differences. Some men are as empathic as the most interpersonally sensitive women, while some women are every bit as able to withstand stress as the most emotionally resilient men. Indeed, on average, looking at the overall ratings for men and women, the strengths and weaknesses average out, so that in terms of total emotional intelligence, there are no sex differences.
Finally, our level of emotional intelligence is not fixed genetically, nor does it develop only in early childhood. Unlike IQ, which changes little after our teen years, emotional intelligence seems to be largely learned, and it continues to develop as we go through life and learn from our experiences—our competence in it can keep growing. In fact, studies that have tracked people's level of emotional intelligence through the years show that people get better and better in these capabilities as they grow more adept at handling their own emotions and impulses, at motivating themselves, and at honing their empathy and social adroitness. There is an old-fashioned word for this growth in emotional intelligence: maturity.
Why This Matters Now
At a California biotech start-up, the CEO proudly enumerated the features that made his organization state-of-the-art: No one, including him, had a fixed office; instead, everyone carried a small laptop—their mobile office—and was wired to everyone else. Job titles were irrelevant; employees worked in cross-functional teams and the place bubbled with creative energy. People routinely put in seventy- and eighty-hour work weeks.
"So what's the downside?" I asked him.
"There is no downside," he assured me.
And that was the fallacy. Once I was free to talk with staff members, I heard the truth: The hectic pace had people feeling burned out and robbed of their private lives. And though everyone could talk via computer to everyone else, people felt that no one was truly listening to them.
People desperately felt the need for connection, for empathy, for open communication.
In the new, stripped-down, every-job-counts business climate, these human realities will matter more than ever. Massive change is a constant; technical innovations, global competition, and the pressures of institutional investors are ever-escalating forces for flux.
Another reality makes emotional intelligence ever more crucial: As organizations shrink through waves of downsizing, those people who remain are more accountable—and more visible. Where earlier a midlevel employee might easily hide a hot temper or shyness, now competencies such as managing one's emotions, handling encounters well, teamwork, and leadership, show—and count--more than ever.
The globalization of the workforce puts a particular premium on emotional intelligence in wealthier countries. Higher wages in these countries, if they are to be maintained, will depend on a new kind of productivity. And structural fixes or technological advances alone are not enough: As at the California biotech firm, streamlining or other innovations often create new problems that cry out for even greater emotional intelligence.
Daniel Goleman other books are:
1. Ecological Intelligence: The Hidden Impacts of What We Buy (2010)
2. Measuring the Immeasurable: The Scientific Case for Spirituality (2008)
3. Social intelligence (2007)
4. Destructive emotions: how can we overcome them? : a scientific dialogue with the Dalai Lama (2004)
5. Healing emotions: conversations with the Dalai Lama on mindfulness, emotions, and health (2003)
6. Working with emotional intelligence (2000)7. Vital lies, simple truths: the psychology of self-deception (1998)
8. The Meditative Mind (1988)
9. Essential Psychotherapy (1987)
10. The varieties of the meditative experience (1977)
1. Building Emotional Intelligence: Techniques to Cultivate Inner Strength in Children (2008) Co-Authored with Linda Lantieri
2. Transparency: How Leaders Create a Culture of Candor (2008) Co-authored with
Warren G. Bennis & James O'Toole
3. The Joy of Living: Unlocking the Secret and Science of Happiness (2008) Co-authored with Yongey Mingyur, & Eric Swanson
4. Primal leadership: learning to lead with emotional intelligence (2004) Co-Authored with Richard E. Boyatzis & Annie McKee
5. The new leaders: transforming the art of leadership into the science of results (2003) Co-authored with Richard E. Boyatzis, Annie McKee
6. The emotionally intelligent workplace: how to select for, measure, and improve emotional intelligence in individuals, groups, and organizations (2001) Co-authored with Cary Cherniss
7. Harvard business review on what makes a leader (2001) Co-Authored with Michael MacCoby, Thomas Davenport, John C. Beck, Clampa Dan
8. Mind Body Medicine: How to Use Your Mind for Better Health (1998) Co-authored with Joel Gurin
9. Worlds in harmony: dialogues on compassionate action (1992) Co-authored with Bstan-ʼdzin-rgya-mtsho (Dalai Lama XIV)10. MindScience: an East-West dialogue (1991) Co-Authored with Robert A. F. Thurman
11. The essential psychotherapies: theory and practice by the masters (1982) Co-authored with Kathleen Riordan Speeth
12. Introductory psychology (1982) Co-authored with Trygg Engen, Anthony Davids
13. Consciousness, the brain, states of awareness, and alternate realities (1979) Co-Authored with Richard J. Davidson
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
Sunday, October 23, 2011
The Wisdom of Crowds by James Surowiecki
Chapter 5: Shall We Dance? Coordination in a Complex World
Page 84-107
5.1. William H Whyte
5.2. Brian Arthur -> El Farol Problem
Ann M. Bell & William A. Sethares
5.3. Thomas C Schelling -> Schelling Points
5.4. Stanley Milgram
Page 84-107
5.1. William H Whyte
5.2. Brian Arthur -> El Farol Problem
Ann M. Bell & William A. Sethares
5.3. Thomas C Schelling -> Schelling Points
5.4. Stanley Milgram
Made to Stick by Chip Heath and Dan Heath
We can engage people's curiosity over a long period of time by systematically "opening gaps" in their knowledge - and then filling those gaps.
After the lead, information is presented in decreasing order of importance. Journalists call this the "inverted pyramid" structure - the most important info (the widest part of the pyramid) is at the top.
Becoming an expert in something means that we become more and more fascinated by nuance and complexity.
Becoming an expert in something means that we become more and more fascinated by nuance and complexity.
When you say three things, you say nothing.
Palm Pilot and James Carville (on the Clinton Campaign) had teams comprised of people who were knowledgeable and passionate about their work - had the capability and desire to do a lot of different things to argue every issue and engineer every feature. Yet in both cases the team needed a simple reminder to fight the temptation to do too much.
People are tempted to tell you everything, with perfect accuracy, right up front, when they should be giving you just enough info to be useful, then a little more, then a little more.
Schemas in Hollywood - Use analogies - Speed was pitched as Die Hard on a bus.
Schemas in Hollywood - Use analogies - Speed was pitched as Die Hard on a bus.
Understand a compact message because they invoke concepts that you already know.
There is value in sequencing information - not dumping a stack of information on someone at once but dropping a clue, then another clue, then another. This method of communication resembles flirting more than lecturing.
Unexpected ideas, by opening a knowledge gap, tease and flirt. They mark a big red X on something that needs to be discovered but don't necessarily tell you how to get there.
Sinatra Test - If I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere
When one example alone is enough to establish credibility in a given domain
Testable credentials - Are you better off now than you were four years ago? Ronald Reagan in the 1980 debate against Carter. Instead of focusing on statistics of inflation, employment rate, interest rates, he deferred to his audience.
The problem is that when you hit listeners between the eyes they respond by fighting back. The way you deliver a message to them is a cue to how they should react. If you make an argument, you're implicitly asking them to evaluate your argument - judge it, debate it, criticize it - and then argue back, at least in their minds. But with a story, Denning argues, you engage the audience - you are involving people with your idea, asking them to participate with you.
The problem is that when you hit listeners between the eyes they respond by fighting back. The way you deliver a message to them is a cue to how they should react. If you make an argument, you're implicitly asking them to evaluate your argument - judge it, debate it, criticize it - and then argue back, at least in their minds. But with a story, Denning argues, you engage the audience - you are involving people with your idea, asking them to participate with you.
Someone tapping a tune can hear the song in their head, while listeners of the tapping cant.
Stories can almost single handedly defeat the Curse of Knowledge. In fast, they naturally emboady most of the SUCCESs framework. Stories are almost always concrete. Most of them have Emotional and Unexpected elements. The hardest part of using stories effectively is making sure that they're Simple - that they reflect your core message. It's not enough to tell a great story, the story has to reflect your agenda.
Stories can almost single handedly defeat the Curse of Knowledge. In fast, they naturally emboady most of the SUCCESs framework. Stories are almost always concrete. Most of them have Emotional and Unexpected elements. The hardest part of using stories effectively is making sure that they're Simple - that they reflect your core message. It's not enough to tell a great story, the story has to reflect your agenda.
Ultimately, the test our success as idea creators isn't whether people mimic our exact words, it's whether we achieve our goals.
The first villain is the natural tendency to bury the lead - to get lost in a sea of information. One of the worst things about knowing a lot, or having access to a lot of information, is that we're tempted to share it all.
The second villain is the tendency to focus on the presentation rather than on the message. Public speakers naturally want to appear composed, charismatic, and motivational. And, certainly, charisma will help a properly designed message stick better. But all the charisma in the world doesn't save a dense, unfocused speech.
The first villain is the natural tendency to bury the lead - to get lost in a sea of information. One of the worst things about knowing a lot, or having access to a lot of information, is that we're tempted to share it all.
The second villain is the tendency to focus on the presentation rather than on the message. Public speakers naturally want to appear composed, charismatic, and motivational. And, certainly, charisma will help a properly designed message stick better. But all the charisma in the world doesn't save a dense, unfocused speech.
To beat decision paralysis, communicators have to do the hard work of finding the core. Lawyers must stress one or two points in their closing arguments, not ten.
The Curse of Knowledge, is a worthy adversary because in some sense it's inevitable. Getting a message across has two stages: the Answer stage and the Telling Others stage. In the Answer stage, you use your expertise to arrive at the idea that you want to share. Doctors study for a decade to be capable of giving the Answer. Business managers may deliberate for months to arrive at the Answer.
The Curse of Knowledge, is a worthy adversary because in some sense it's inevitable. Getting a message across has two stages: the Answer stage and the Telling Others stage. In the Answer stage, you use your expertise to arrive at the idea that you want to share. Doctors study for a decade to be capable of giving the Answer. Business managers may deliberate for months to arrive at the Answer.
Business managers seem to believe that once they've clicked through a PowerPoint presentation showcasing their conclusions, they've successfully communicated their ideas. What they've done is share data. If they're good speakers, they may even have created an enhanced sense, among their employees and peers that they are "decisive" or "managerial" or "motivational". But, like the Stanford students, the surprise will come when they realize that nothing they've said had impact. They've shared data, but they haven't created ideas that are useful and lasting. Nothing stuck.
The Communication Framework:
For an idea to stick, for it to be useful and lasting, it's got to make the audience:
- Pay attention - Unexpected
- Understand and remember it - Concrete
- Agree/Believe - Credible
- Care - Emotional
- Be able to act on it - Story
Symptom: Apathy - No one seems fired up about this
Solution: Remember the Mother Teresa effect - people care more about individuals than they do about abstractions. Tell them an inspiring Challenge plot or Creativity ploy story. Tap into their sens of their own identities like the "Don't Mess with Texas" ads.
Curse of knowledge tempts people to use language that is sweeping, high-level, and abstract: The most efficient manufacturer of semiconductors? The lowest-cost provider of stereo equipment! World class customer service!
Psychologists have uncovered situations where the mere existence of choice, even choice among several good options, seems to paralyze us in making decisions.
Psychologists have uncovered situations where the mere existence of choice, even choice among several good options, seems to paralyze us in making decisions.
Three barriers to talking strategy - The Curse of Knowledge, decision paralysis, and the lack of a common strategic vocabulary - emerge for different reasons, but they can be overcome in similar ways.
Be concrete - Specific and sensory - So everyone understands you message in a similar way.
- Say something unexpected - Don't waste your time communicating a common sense strategy - Identify the uncommon sense - new or different aspects of the strategy.
- Tell stories - A good story is better than an abstract statement
The conventional wisdom is that leaders should spend a lot of their time presenting and discussing strategy. The most common refrain in strategic communication is repetition, repetition, repetition. Keep repeating the strategy, again and again, until it finally sinks in. Here's the problem: Repetition doesn't prevent the Curse of Knowledge or encourage two-way communication.
Rather we are proposing that leaders treat strategy as a two-step process: Step 1 is determining the right strategy. Step 2 is communicating it in a way that allows it to become part of the organizational vocabulary. Both are necessary.
If strategies are to be living and active - if they are to become embodied in the actions of employees and outside partners - they must be woven into day-to-day conversations and decisions.
If your frontline employees can talk about your strategy, can tell stories about it, can talk back to their managers and feel credible doing so, then the strategy is doing precisely what it was intended to do: guide behavior.
To make an idea simple, then, first find the core of your lesson, then anchor it in knowledge that your students already have.
Sticky = understandable, memorable, and effective in changing thought or behavior.
SUCCESs: Simple, Unexpected, Concrete, Credible, Emotional, Stories
Sticky = understandable, memorable, and effective in changing thought or behavior.
SUCCESs: Simple, Unexpected, Concrete, Credible, Emotional, Stories
The Villain: The Curse of Knowledge - It's hard to be a tapper. Creativity starts with templates: Beat the curse with the SUCCESs checklist:
- Simple
- Find the Core - Commander's intent - Determine the single most important thing. Inverted pyramid. Don't bury the lead. The pain of decision paralysis. Names, names, names.
- Share the Core - Simple = core + compact. Proverbs: sound bites that are profound. Visual proverbs: The Palm Pilot wood block. How to pack a lot of punch into a compact communication:
- Tap into existing schemas: The pomelo
- Create a high concept pitch: Die Hard on a bus
- Use a generative analogy: Disney's cast members
- Unexpected
- Get Attention: Surprise - Break a pattern - The surprise brow: a pause to collect information.
- Hold attention - Interest - Create a mystery - Highlight a knowledge gap. Use the news-teaser approach.
- Concrete
- Help people understand and remember. Write with the concreteness of a fable. Make abstraction concrete by redefining it. Provide a concrete context. Put people into the story. Use more hooks in your idea.
- Help people coordinate - Find common ground at a shared level of understanding. Set common goals in tangible terms - Our plane will land on runway 4-22. Make it real. Why concreteness helps - white things vs white things in your fride. Create a turf where people can bring their knowledge to bear. Talk about people, not data.
- Credible
- Help people believe
- External credibility - Authorities and anti-authorities
- Internal credibility - Use convincing details - Jurors and the Darth Vader toothbrush. Make stats accessible - Nukes as bbs. The Sinatra Test. Use testable credentials.
- Emotional
- Make people care - Mother Teresa principle - If I look at the one, I will act
- Use the power of association -
- Appeal to self interest
- Appeal to identity - Don't mess with Texas
- Stories
- Get people to act
- Stories as simulations - Tell people how to act
- Stories as inspiration
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